Tuesday, July 17, 2007
We are still riding the roller coaster but now it is going in a positive direction. Monday Jordan woke up crying and telling us that he did not want to go to swim. It took us an hour to get him to calm down and stop fighting us. I was ready to give up, but Bobby helped me to be strong. He's gonna love it, we just kept saying. This is about getting through this with strength and perseverance. And we did.
He was hesistant to go, but he got dressed. He was upset when it was time to go, but he got in the car. He was fearful of getting in the water, but he did. He swam for one hour, back and forth, doing drills, listening to the coach's instructions. Everybody passed him in the water but you could tell he was trying. He needs to work on keeping his legs straight to gain speed. When he got out of the pool and started walking toward me I was not sure what he would say. The last few times he has said, "I don't want to do it anymore." So I held my breath. He came to me and said, "I love it." Wow. It was what I wanted to hear but I was not sure he meant it.
So this morning I was hesitant again. He moaned and complained a bit, but less then before. He was nervous getting into the pool, and crying a bit but he made it through another day. And the best thing, the coach told him he was doing a good job! Jordan was so proud of himself. And I was proud of him too. And thankful to the coach for seeing that that is what Jordan needed, some positive reinforcement.
I hope he learns to give new experiences a try. And that it may take a while before you can make a decision. Don't let fear guide you. And believe that you can, because we believe that he can do anything. I have gained strength from this, too. Just keep going, keep believing and not to let fear take control, see where he gets it from? We have to pick our battles with him, sometimes it really is just not worth it. So he refuses to ride Buzz Lightyear at Disneyland for a year. And now that he has, he's just not that crazy about it. We have to know when to push and when to just let it be.
We really think that this battle was worth the fight. He now has an activity that is his own. He will learn to set goals and by hard work, to achieve them. He will learn what it means to be on a team and cheer each other on. And maybe in September he will compete and win some ribbons. Oh wait, one battle at a time.