on motherhood

"motherhood is a choice you make everyday, to put someone else's happiness and well-being ahead of your own. to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing, even when you're not sure what the right thing is... and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong." donna ball

i am constantly wondering what the right thing is. being mom is tough. i second guess my decisions but stick to my guns once the decision has been made. it has taught me to trust my instincts. it has clarified my beliefs and what i think are important values.

i would prefer that last sentence say "and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for everything you do wrong." mistakes are made. apologies are necessary. it's most important to admit when something goes wrong. i talk a lot with the kids and ask them about how a situation was handled. next time, what can we do differently? but i don't think i'm doing everything wrong.

i have loving, mature, happy kids. i give and receive love and positive reinforcement everyday. i am proud of my family and feel that they will be good members of our society who believe in following their dreams, taking care of others and working hard.

yes, motherhood is a choice i make everyday. this is my job. i don't always get it right but i am always working on doing the best i can.

what i love most

"what i love most about my home is who i share it with."  

i get to share my life and heart with these amazing beings.  they make life fun, challenging and unbelievably worthwhile.  i am so blessed to have each one of them in my life.  this right here is all i need.

wishing you a happy valentine's day close to those you love!

a surprise concert

i love a good surprise.  well, actually i don't love surprise parties.  they are too much work, you have to deceive the ones you love and i don't think all of that work and hassle is worth the five minute surprise.  but that's just me. i do love mini surprises though; buying the kids donuts after telling them they couldn't have any, putting a love note in bobby's car (which i haven't done in a long time), and planning a little big surprise for the boys.

it all came about in a bizarre way.  we were given some awesome tickets to the clippers vs. lakers game last wednesday night.  we never go to games so this was a treat.

basketball is not big in our house, and we haven't been to a game in years, but we couldn't pass up vip seats.  it was a blow out game but we had a good time. i was more interested in watching fergie perform and seeing what the kardashians were doing courtside.  they were eating popcorn and texting in case you were wondering.

during the game, bobby got an email that the foo fighters were putting on a surprise benefit concert on saturday at the forum.  he ran out to the lobby for better reception and was able to score 4 tickets for the show.  it was then that we decided not to tell the kids.  i organized a sleep over for sofia at her friend's house - thanks debbie - and we were set.

it's hard for me to keep secrets.  i was excited for them and i wanted them to know so they could be excited too.  but i also knew that it would be cool to drive up to the forum, hand jordan his foo fighters t-shirt and tell them we were going to see them live.  i even had to act surprised when we heard the commercial on the radio about the concert.  "i thought they weren't going to be here until september?" i listened as they explained.  i felt bad, but so good.

on saturday, we dropped sofia off and then told the boys we were going to see interstellar at a cool movie theater in hollywood - it helps that they don't know the difference.

we went to eat at a mexican restaurant and that is when we decided we had to tell them.  at first they were confused, then they thought we were kidding, then they were stunned and excited and quiet.  as we made our way to the forum the traffic was unbearable and it was raining constantly.  we made it in with enough time to get some t-shirts and find our seats.

not the best seats but none of us were complaining.

it was a concert in the round and the stage rotated which gave everyone a good view of the band.  jordan actually liked when the band had their back to us because he could get a better view of taylor hawins, the drummer. win-win.

we were sitting close to the ramp that led to the stage.  dave grohl would walk up and down playing his guitar and wowing the crowd.  this was also the runway that his special guests used to make their entrance. guests like paul stanley, slash, tenacious d, alice cooper, perry farrell,

and david lee roth!  when he came out on stage the crowd went crazy.  i may have been a bit excited too.  i listened to van halen growing up because i had/have two brothers who lived and breathed rock music.  they played in bands, had electric guitars painted like eddie van halen's and played their music over and over.  i don't think i had a choice but to be a fan too.  it was awesome to see dlr on stage dancing around like he was 20 and singing "panama" and "ain't talkin' 'bout love".

it was also dave grohl's birthday. so the audience, led by jack black, sang happy birthday as hundreds of balloons fell from the sky.  that turned the atmosphere into a party.

i haven't been to a concert like this in a long time.  every single person was singing and in awe during the three and a half hour show.

and he watched in amazement.  it's moments like this that i realize he has a dream of being on stage and playing the drums to a sold out crowd.  he wants to make music and entertain people and have a good time. i know that it's a tough insane road if that's what you choose to do with your life and very few people make it.  but i also know that dreams are for chasing.

we were both happy, and a little deaf, at the end of the night.

andrew and bobby had their own experience at the other end of the stadium.  it was andrew's first concert and he was a bit stunned by what he saw. i'm not sure he's ever heard the f-bomb dropped more times than that night. it would have been fun to sit together but we were grateful to be able to give them this little surprise.

new year's 2015

my favorite week of the year is the one between christmas and new year's.  the frenzy of christmas is over. everyone is enjoying new toys and the five of us get to hang out together for a week and do whatever we want, or nothing at all.

i met with a friend who was visiting from up north.  she has been a dear friend since our boys were in pre-school and i enjoy spending time with her, catching up, and sharing family stories.  our boys are the same age, similar in mindset and interests and are going through the same phases of their lives - which gives us plenty to talk about.  just wish they lived closer.

on monday we took the kids on a hike here in the valley.  such a great place to go and it's easy enough for the kids to do.  we made a goal during our walk to do this more often this year.

we found the swing.

we had a special guest over for dinner - our school's headmaster.  the kids were a bit nervous to have him over but they warmed up to him right away.  i made sopes de chorizo for dinner and he brought poached pears and ice cream for dessert.  turns out he's a fabulous cook.

we also spent one day on campus shooting a promo video for the school gala.

for new year's we went to our friends house.  just a small gathering which is fine with us.  it was casual but still felt like a party.

and they have a home theater system.  don't you love those lincoln commercials?

we had a tostada bar and lots of desserts to choose from.  after dinner we played a game called things and totally 80's trivial pursuit.  i grew up in the 80's but i was terrible at this game.

kids and grown ups gathered around the tv at midnight to watch the ball drop and make a toast to a happy new year. and to sing happy birthday to jordan.

he still loves having his birthday on new year's day.  we had family over on the first to celebrate with him.  we love having a full house to start off the new year.

the very next day we grabbed our snow clothes and went up to kernville for a few days.  we had two goals, 1. to play in the snow and 2. to spend time with our cousins.

but first we had some hot chocolate.

this was during the cold spell in the valley but in kernville the temperature was sunny and the slopes were icy with no fresh snow.  

they didn't care.

and found enough snow to have a snowball fight.

and spent time with our awesome cousins.

we accomplished our goals.

saturday we went for a hike.  something we talk about every time we go to kernville.  there are fantastic hikes here but we just never make a point of doing them.  so this day we did.  plus we needed to add some steps to our fitbits.  the first thing sofia saw was the no quads sign - she was bummed.

it was an easy trail for the kids.  there were lots of places for them to chase "zombie lions."

we ended up at this little stream

with a cool bridge.

andrew taking care of his 3 year old cousin right before she told him she loved him.  this is what these days are all about.

dinner was pizza, wine and a card game then we went home.  that gave us one day to unpack our suitcases, put christmas away and get ready for monday - boohoo.

can't think of a better way to say goodbye to 2014 and start the new year.  

editor's note: on yesterday's post i was corrected that winter solstice is actually the shortest day/longest night of the year.  either way it was a fun party.

christmas 2014

this holiday season was one for the books.  what made it so special for me was that i enjoyed every minute of it.  from the shopping for gifts to the christmas songs we listened to everyday to the cooking and eating. i took time to let the moment sink in knowing full well that it would be pass quickly.

before the kids went on break they had their holiday concert.  it was done a little differently this year; on campus, during the day, and school wide.  the music director hit it out of the park.  the music was fantastic and the kids were all showcased perfectly.

another difference this year was that the class parties were immediately after the performance.  it made for a very full and exciting day.

that weekend sofia went to the american girl doll store to celebrate her cousins birthday.

and we went to our friends' holiday party.  every year at his party we meet up with some friends of ours.  i wish we could make time to get together more than once a year.  maybe this year we will.

on sunday, sofia and i went to see a christmas carol at a local playhouse with friends from school.

and then to a summer solstice party. i love the tradition of celebrating the longest day of the year. they promised to make this a yearly event.

we took the kids to see the hobbit and enjoyed a theater all to ourselves.

i got to the store early to get food for christmas day and to finish off the shopping.

christmas eve we went to church with my parents. standing room only at the children's mass.

then we picked up chinese food for dinner and played some cards.

and we put the baby to bed.

christmas morning we enjoyed the fireplace on ktla and even more when "grandma" put another log on the fire. looking at this picture brings me right back to that morning.

santa made their wishes come true.

we were a little confused by our gifts from santa:  chocolate and a fitbit.  i guess you call that balance.

bobby got this cool blanket for the lego master.

i have our breakfast down at this point;  chocolate croissants, scrambled eggs, bacon, latkes with applesauce and fruit.  and to drink?  mimosas and hot chocolate. we look forward to the chocolate croissants every year - even though we could have them year round.

and the annual measuring of the kids.

pure joy.

christmas evening we went to my sister and brother-in-law's place for more merriment.

 my siblings.

and in-law selfies.

we do a gift exchange with my family - makes it a lot easier with ur big family.  it's always fun to see who everyone bought gifts for.  this year it was a perfect match.

after dinner we played heads up.

an awesome family selfie to end the night.

it was a very merry christmas.